I Reserve The Right

So I met with a client this evening, hoping to land them. I have to say generally, these are pretty easy going meetings, as both parties are on the same page and want the same things. So I was hopeful and expecting tonight to be no different.

Well it was different. I met my perspective client and her husband. Initially both seemed welcoming and hospitable. After sitting down we got right to it. However, before we actually got started my potential client's husband tried to, in my opinion, razz or frazzle me...perhaps break the ice with a straight and pointed question; "Am I any good". He's a boisterous type guy, I thought, from the short time I met him. Perhaps authoritative is a better word. Unfazed I replied "yes I think so and so do my clients".

After the initial "question/ice breaker" was over with, I start the conversation about myself, my background, education, and some other relevant history. So far things are going well. I ask my potential client about her goals, issues, and obstacles. She shared some of these things with me prior to our meeting, which I won't here for privacy reasons. Our back and forth conversation was going well. We both asked and answered questions, although I did feel that it was a little one sided (mine). This isn't all that uncommon though.

After a brief pause in our conversation the husband pipes up again. He has been sitting there the whole time pretty quite just listening, and making a few snickers at his wife's expense. This time however, he blasts another pointed question at me.

How many client pay you in full? - Then it changed to; How many clients like paying you up front? Which led to; What's gonna happen when I pay you and then never see you again?...what's your Plan B? - Oh I should note that he asked where I lived just before that. So looking back on the
conversation, I think to myself...was that a threat? I think it was.

So for the next 15 to 20 mins this guy busted my balls. From client lists, to official business certifications, to stealing from them, to how do I know if his wife is following my instructions when I'm not there. Look much of what he said were potentially very real concerns and perfectly fine questions. I don't have a problem with tough or directed questions. What I didn't like was his tone and demeanor. This guy wanted to show me that he was the boss, the "alpha male", the "good" business owner, the concerned (controlling? husband), unfortunately I don't respond well to that bullshit. While at the house I answered as best I could and let the tone and unfounded issues roll off. At one point I had to admit to him that I didn't know how to belay his concerns. However, later in the car and up to this very point, it really pisses me off.

You know some people are like that. They have to "bark", it's what they do. This guy seems to be better than mildly successful, but it seems that may have come at the expense of personal tact. So fortunately for me these client meetings go both ways. I HOPE to land a client, but sometimes they don't feel me and want to go a different direction. That's cool and fine by me, no hard feelings, that's business. I have the same right. If I meet with a client and I am not feeling that person, or their spouse decides to be overly zealous...even if borne out of concern...I reserve the right of no service.

Which is what I did.
After I got home I thought about it and it stewed, and stewed. Finally I had to send and email out. I basically thanked her for her time and let her know that after review and consideration of our meeting that I felt that another trainer may better fit her needs.

I thought to myself...is this going to validate some of the issues that the husband had? That perhaps he "scared" me straight, or at least enough to not bring that shit to his door? I really didn't want to validate him.
So I offered to provide references upon request. I don't care if they ask for them or not...but if they do I feel more than comfortable with the professionalism and quality of me and the service I provide.

I feel sorry for the lady...she needs some help and guidance. It's clear that without it she will continue to have her issues. If only her husband wasn't a dick.

Two Things...

When my wife wants to express something to me; an idea, a thought, a story, a leacture, whatever...she always starts it with "two things". It's one of those cute things that is only cute to you, whether you're a boy or girlfriend, husband or wife. The little quirks that put a smile on your face no matter how annoying it would be and IS when anyone else does it.



WELL you know what today I was bothered, frustrated and felt a little stupid. By what and why you might ask....



Two things....



First, I'm taking a shower this morning, and realized that I needed to wash my hair. Now I don't have a whole lot of hair to wash. I'm not bald, but some might say I'm a little faster than my hair....think about it.....Good!! But really I keep it pretty close to the noggin. I can't remember the last time I paid for a hair cut. Even with a high and tight buzz cut I still need to give it a good clean. I've got my own special shampoo; yeah special, that's what I said, but I decided to go with something a little more I don't know ...healthy for my hair. It doesn't grow back as fast as it used to.



So I look around and see that my wife has multiple bottles of shampoos and conditioners. I choose one and read the lable...for "Curly to Straight". I think that's not what I need, and choose another. For "Dry to Moisterized",hmmm Not that one either. NEXT..."Flat to Volume". An another...for "Oily Hair". NOW at this point I'm thinking I've got 2 more to go and this is some bullshit. Why can't they make a "Dirty to Clean" That's all I need? I mean if it was alright I'd rum some Lava with Pumice on my head. It would both clean, exfoliate, and get rid excess oil.



But the real issue, I finally realized, is that my wife has like 6 different shampoos in our shower. She's basically got a Walgreens in in the corner. When I confronted her about this, about how can she have so many shampoos and whatnot...She just looked at me and said...You have "special shampoo...I have special hair".



And 2...After the great shampoo debate, I walk into the closet barefoot. I feel something under my foot. I step back and look to see what it was. I couldn't see anything. So I put my foot down and sure enough I felt it again. It just felt like something was in the carpet and needed to be picked up. A normal person would bend over and look and pick up whatever it is or at least feel for it....NOT ME. I decide, actually I can't really call it a decision, to just step down harder.



I damn near drove a needle through my pinky toe.



My wife come in to see what's the matter. With a scowl on my face I tell her. She then goes..."oh I was wondering what happened to that".



I was furious...I started to lay into her..and just as I really got going she said...I can explain. I said go ahead. She said...ok 2 things.

It's not my fault you're still fat

I'm a personal trainer....well I've done it enough to say I am. I've just started the "business" of being in business. I used to be a character from "Office Space". I lived in a cube and did about 45 mins of real work every day. - Not really I was pretty good at what I did. I just didn't like it. I had had enough of treading water and not making a real dent in ...well, anything. Run this report, analyze this, chart that, stick that in a spreadsheet, make a power point presentation, fill out your TPS report...what the hell is a TPS report? Actually TPS reports aren't real, at least I hope not. I never filed one...anyway more on that later.

So I have clients that contact me through my website or word of mouth. I meet with them and we talk about their goals and what they hope to achieve from out training sessions. ALMOST 100% of the time it's I want to lose weight. This is what I now live for. It's like shooting fish in a barrel. Once they meet with me, they are hooked. they've taken the time to search and vet me out and are now personally invested. I don't directly try to take advantage of that, but it's hard not to want to. You see, I like successes, which is why I meet with people first; so they can see me and I can see them. Will we work well together, will the client work, follow directions, take suggestions etc... I get some clients who work really hard and do great. I get some who just go through the motions. Then there are those who piss and moan about it all. All three are fine, but what really pisses me off, is after I've spent my time (paid of course), to create workouts, establish and suggest diet changes, give suggestions for workouts when we don't meet, get up EARLY EARLY in the mornings to drag myself to where ever we meet, and I still get complaints about "I'm not losing weight." Not only do they complain but they blame me.

So to the "I didn't make you lose weight complainers"...I'm about to write you a reality check, or would you prefer the cold, hard cash of truth?

I bust your ass every day that we meet. That I guarantee. You are the ones that choose to workout only 3 times a week or less, but yet you want to lose 30 pounds. How are you going to do that? You are that ones that go out at night and drink beer and eat cheese fries because you think you did good by working out. You are the ones that don't take my advice and walk or do some other exercise on the days we don't meet. You are the ones that continue to ignore my diet advice. The fact of the matter is you MUST sacrifice to lose weight. YOU MUST make changes in your lifestyle. Paying me $35 per session (which is a GREAT DEAL by the way) isn't a magic weight loss bullet. Neither is Power 90, or Jillian Michaels, or anything else on DVD. A trainer and or exercise is only half of the solution. YOU ARE THE OTHER HALF! You are ultimately responsible for the changes you go through, for the goals you reach, for the weight you lose.

Bottom line:
You have to decide and make an choice to lose weight, to diet, to change your eating habits, to exercise...You pay me to hold you accountable...only on the days you choose to meet with me. So when a trainer; me or someone else, gives you advice...take it and follow it...unless it's stupid. Hopefully you'll know the difference. If not, just don't drop anything on your head.